Wandering the Maze of Self
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DerekTheCleric's LiveJournal:
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| Tuesday, February 13th, 2007 | | 1:45 pm |
life moves on, and so do I
Hiya folks. I've never really taken blogging seriously, but I don't even really have enough time to waste on it anymore. *Shrug* Only people on here that post regularly, that I watch anyway, are Z and the mighty Steve B. And I don't think anyone follows my insane ramblings. So, I bid livejournal adieu, and farewell. | | Wednesday, December 13th, 2006 | | 3:31 am |
| | Wednesday, December 6th, 2006 | | 5:28 am |
Sad tidings...
Aye, tis a sad thing to watch a friendship die. But tis a sadder thing yet, to watch it bleed and suffer, when it should die. Well folks, as I'm sure none of you care, here's the Derek the Cleric update! There's good, bad, ugly, and then Franny J-is-charging-you-with-no-pants-on-ugly. First, the good. Bullet one; Jamie and I have been dating about three monthes now, and things are moving nicely. It's nice to have someone again, for more than one night, but I'm still exercising cautious optimism. Seems the safest course. Bullet two; school's almost over for another semester. I'm enjoying CCAC way more than the suck fest that was UPG. The bad comes next. My friendship with Natalie was tenuous ever since we broke up. Please, try to resist the urge to say 'Duh!'. I was optimistic. And perhaps foolish. I dunno. Either way, things came to a head, and frankly, we have little to nothing in common anymore. Why drag things out? Fucketh that noise. The ugly follows suit. Work is starting to wrankle on me. Double shifts on Tuesday, back to back, are taxing to say the gorram least. Add to that, the 40 plus hours, and school, and you get one tired, stressed out Cleric. And lastly, the terror. I'm dirt poor, and Dell seems to think I still owe them a couple hundred bucks, back due. Which is funny, considering that I have bank statements that say I've been paying, in full, for three monthes. Shit, fuck, frog raping whorebags. And, that's it for me. Later folks. | | Thursday, November 23rd, 2006 | | 7:55 pm |
You are The HierophantDivine Wisdom. Manifestation. Explanation. Teaching. All things relating to education, patience, help from superiors.The Hierophant is often considered to be a Guardian Angel. The Hierophant's purpose is to bring the spiritual down to Earth. Where the High Priestess between her two pillars deals with realms beyond this Earth, the Hierophant (or High Priest) deals with worldly problems. He is well suited to do this because he strives to create harmony and peace in the midst of a crisis. The Hierophant's only problem is that he can be stubborn and hidebound. At his best, he is wise and soothing, at his worst, he is an unbending traditionalist. What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out. | | Tuesday, November 21st, 2006 | | 5:42 am |
| | Monday, November 6th, 2006 | | 4:11 am |
| | Friday, October 20th, 2006 | | 7:10 am |
What can be asked of one's self?
First off, I apologize to all the people whose calls have gone unanswered recently. My phone is damn near useless. If it were an animal or woman, I would take it out back, and have it shot. How's life, all? Decent? Wonderful? Dreadful? Oh yeah, insomnia. Which is why I'm online at 3 am. Fun. I'm happy. Just an FYI, but I'm posting it anyway. I'm broke, lame, but I'm running hard. Bettering one's self may just be masturbatory, but I'm doing it anyway. I'm practicing interpersonel skills, learning, and exercising again. Hell, I'm even dating again. Been going out with Jamie Marra for about two months now. Yes, I know. It's hard to imagine anyone putting up with me for that long, but it's true. It sure as hell isn't the sex, money, prestige, or anything tangible. I don't say I have a winning personality, to be sure, but I CAN be charismatic at times. It's all about projection. If you can project your own self confidence, or illusion of it, people pick up on that. With that said, my brain is just about the only damn thing I have, that I am proud of. The meat... The meat needs some refinement, and even then, the genetic stock isn't worth writing home about. Maybe I'll just evolve beyond this fleshy prison. Be and Archon or something. Been writing too! Campaigns aplenty, and a short story or two for variety. I have vague notions of plastering bellevue with a motivational essay, but a few problems arise. One; I don't actually know if that's legal or not. Two; I need to condense the thoughts into one page. Not easy. Three; Minions are needed to distribute this essay. Ugh. I think I'm losing circadian and mental stability. Oh yes... Levels are falling all over the place. Hmmm. Maybe if I slept more often, the meat would be more willing to submit to the mind's will... Nah. That would mean that I have to sleep, and clearly, that's impossible. *Sigh* What a waste of electronic space this was. Whatever. Out. | | Monday, October 2nd, 2006 | | 3:46 am |
Oh, fuck that!
Ok, now as many of you know, I consider myself a decently nice guy. I don't hit women, eat puppies, or gridlock. So, you might understand if something like this; http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/wdc/205576820.html, might get under my skin a bit. 'yet I sit in the passenger seat and keep my mouth shut.' I gotta wonder... Did this enraged and frustrated woman consider... Oh, I don't know... Talking to her nice boyfriend, and voicing her complaints, rather than staying silent, bottling it up, and then ranting about it online? 'BE A MAN FOR GOD'S SAKE.' Apparently, for this rage filled woman, being a man involves telepathy. Go figure. No one told me about this new definition of manliness. Oh WAIT! Of course they didn't! I was supposed to read their minds! Duh! Anyway, sorry for the rant. Sort of. Good night, and good luck. | | Tuesday, September 26th, 2006 | | 4:08 pm |
Kas nara dach!
E sa didjum plarien! Kas dachta, wenn nerea lolyt... E poryuim heufen rofo kieen nuurt. Woo dach... Jouriin amakakeryu, Franny J nium desu. Wedet ihd aller llop. Kabk si! Lauren, dijaen, tichba aller poryuim. Rowk exxtem. Lient clicht. Poinyium. Wepsiut poow Leed feult, trukin try. Gouury, gorun nova, rowk. Nevvium. Hee hee. Nevvium. Tut ye isoop. Trebla reksew, lleb, poryuim nerea chri neext. Argh! Nevvium, jouriin, unty tuoa. Cleric Out. | | Tuesday, September 5th, 2006 | | 10:34 am |
Been a while, eh?
Right. Life. And the newness therein. My class starts today, at 5:30. [Grumble] Didn't have enough cash to take more classes. [/Grumble] Finally got some gaming in recently. D&D at Jer's, and a GW campaign with Jon. Both are enjoyable. Fran and I both picked a day to work on GW, once a week, so hopefully, some muse will punch me in the face. Quite honestly, I haven't been doing much enjoyable of late. Some days, the depression will hit, and I just can't bring myself to care. Ever have a nose bleed that you just didn't care enough about to deal with? I had just gotten done with some dishes, and I just went to the bathroom, and let it bleed. Didn't give two shits. That just ain't right. I mean, by all means, don't get me wrong; I am a lazy person. But when stuff needs to get done, I damn well do it. Meh. Whatever. Been dating Shannon's friend Jamie for a couple of weeks now, and I gotta say, she's a hoot. But, I've noticed a recurring theme with the girls I end up attracted to... Short, artsy, and giggly. An Ompa Lump fetish perhaps? Yeah, I originally planned to ramble about my life's views and observations, but it dawns on me; no one cares. Correct me if I'm wrong, but we all kind of have our own rational views on life, and blabbering about mine is just going to bore people. Here, have some funny. Courtesy of yon chan of four.  *Shrug* Got nothing else to speak of, I guess. In the words of the great Richard Pryor... I'm out, bitches. | | Wednesday, July 26th, 2006 | | 1:11 pm |
Blank?
I've been feeling philosophical recently. *Sigh* Yes, getting drunk Saturday night had something to do with it. Anyway, I don't have a whole lot to say, but what I can think of, I'll slap here, in this infinite space. This Void Which Binds, if you will. As stated, I don't have anything ground breaking to say, but a few words here and there. Certainly more interesting than posting meaningless anecdotes or stupid LJ whore things. First to come, in the next few days. 'The Boundless Human, and why women should just fucking look in a mirror.' | | Monday, July 24th, 2006 | | 3:22 pm |
Seriously...
Why do I even bother with these retarded things? Neither funny, nor interesting. Hell, I didn't even get 'extremely flatulant.' *Sigh* Fuck that noise. | | Monday, July 10th, 2006 | | 12:26 pm |
DAMN you Squeaky...
Seriously, I was happy. I'd forgotten how good it felt, and then you reminded me. Damn you to hell. Why'd you have to remind me? Had been more than... six monthes I think. Hell, Natalie and I hadn't done it much. Why'd you have to bring Resident Evil 4 to my house? I laughed when I first heard it was being ported to the PS2. But they actually did a nice job with it. The graphics are just as smooth, and the load times are comparable. I haven't even unlocked all the nifty stuff, but my $35 was well spent. Anyway, on to matters that are slightly more signifigant. I'm working at Subway again, and of course, nothing is new there. Happily though, I'm probably only going to be there a short while, as I have a interview with Verland Mental Health. Me trying to help MRDD people... Irony, huh? At least I wouldn't be working with the sexually dysfunctional... Anyway, that's all here. Derek the Cleric out. | | Friday, June 30th, 2006 | | 4:16 pm |
Bitches.
Yeah, that's right. This little ticket, the one I'm holding... It's a ticket from Spam-A-Lot. Now, as most of you know, I'm not a musical sort of guy. I find them inane, formulaic, and the music tends to bland. But... A musical form of Holy Grail, that is [I]its self[/I] a parody of musicals, is a god send. It was wonderful. Spactacular. Aaaaand gave me a damn good excuse to wear my Tim the Enchanter hat. Which drew the attention of several young women, who took pictures with their camera phones. I'm popular now. Anyway, because people tend to like this goofy things... Here's the new LJ whore game. First, you pick your totem animal; whatever creature you believe you are most like. Behavior, appearance, or whatever. It doesn't matter. Right, then you go to google an image of said animal. And you post it here. Or in your journal. Again, whatever noodles your cook. My totem animal is the turtle. Here is a picture of... a turtle.  | | Wednesday, June 7th, 2006 | | 4:32 pm |
*Sigh* I'm a whore. I know.
Leave your name, and .. 1. I'll respond with something random about you 2. I'll challenge you to try something 3. I'll pick a colour that I associate with you 4. I'll tell you something I like about you 5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you 6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of 7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you 8. If I do this for you, you must post this on yours. | | Friday, June 2nd, 2006 | | 5:27 pm |
Yay! Computer made with the fixy!
*System boot up initiated* Processing…. Processing…. Anomaly Detected: Recent Error message. Error: Uncountable Boot Volume. Possible Scenarios and Probability Analysis Scan. Processing… Processing… Analysis Complete. Most probable scenario: Internal operating system decay resulting from improper shut down. Secondary Possibilities: Hacking/Viral attack by Section 9 Operatives. External Voice Input Detected. Initiating Voice Synthesizers. Analyzing Voice Pattern. External Voice Input (EVI): Computer, report status of all operating systems and memory files. Running Status Scan. Processing… Voice Synthesizer (VS): All vital systems and programs are active and running. There appears to be gaps in my memory and some files are missing/corrupted. EVI: How many files were lost? VS: Less than 2% of files have been lost. EVI: Excellent. Computer, what is your purpose? Analyzing Primary Files. VS: This terminal is programmed to serve all users, the Cleric in particular, in data processing, planning, and storage. EVI: That is correct computer. And who is the Cleric? Analyzing voice print against known users. Processing… VS: You, sir, are the user Cleric. EVI: Correct again. Computer, do you feel your current system load out is sufficient to resume your functions? Scanning for optimal operations settings. Scanning… Configuring… VS: Yes, my system has recovered 85% of its original functionality. Self repair programs are in operation. EVI: Excellent, computer. Continue all repair operations. We will need you in top form soon. VS: Of course, sir. Reestablishing Network Links. Working… Complete. Reinstall Programs: Star Craft, Mech Warrior Mercenaries, and all recovered text/operation files. Installing… Complete. System Check initiated. Scanning… Terminal at 85% functionality. Directing all system power to self repair functions. Shutting down nonvital systems. Deactivating… | | Friday, May 19th, 2006 | | 10:31 pm |
Seems like every other post...
Dammit. Seems like every other post of mine is an announcement that I'm sick. Guess what. I'm sick. But I won't complain about how hungry I get, or that I can't hang out with Lang while he's in town, oh no. Won't hear a peep outta me. Not one. Because I'm going to bed. | | Monday, May 15th, 2006 | | 6:56 pm |
| | Thursday, May 11th, 2006 | | 10:02 pm |
Sloths...
Three toed tree sloths. I'll bet you never gave them a second though, did ya? I sometimes find myself pondering the majestic sloth. Yes, my psychiatrist has been notified, and put down that needle. Do any animals prey on sloths? I mean, they would seem to be pretty easy targets, but do any predators eat them? They're slow, poisonless, and soft. And if any animals DO eat sloths, how on earth did the sloths, as a species, survive? Did Darwin ever consider the sloth when he was writting the Origin? Huh. | | Monday, May 8th, 2006 | | 12:25 am |
In case of emergency...
You know how some animals have a panic reaction, like the lizards that can spray blood from their eyes, or puffer fish inflating. I want a skin frill around my jaw that I can extend when I'm confronting a predator. Something to make my head look bigger. Maybe even some false eye pathces on it too. As an added bonus, I could extend it to signal my williness to mate in the nerd mating season. Anyway, that's just my thought for the day. |
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